Thursday, February 26, 2009

State of the Litterbox

Whatever your political affiliation, please indulge me as my overzealous imagination once again skids off the main highway and takes the uneven, gravel back roads to Crazy Town (of which I am the self-proclaimed mayor). Speaking of public offices held by unlikely, yet exceptionally well qualified parties, I was recently pondering the prospect of a president with a purr-box. What would happen if an American Bobtail occupied the Oval Office? What if a Sphynx signed and vetoed bills? Could a Siamese's sassy mouth win a debate? Here are my thoughts on some possible implications if a cat were elected president.


* A law would immediately be passed to mandate daily naps.

* There would be a strict requirement for playtime.

* There would be no need for a White House chef; a human with mad can opening skills would do the trick.

* Cat army = money saved on night vision goggles

* Government subsidies would be provided for eco-friendly cat litter.

* There would be a tax credit on each kitten that is spayed or neutered.

* Animal Planet reporters would have a front row spot at all press conferences

* Goodbye Rose Garden, hello Catnip Garden

* A position on the cabinet would be created for a rep from the Cat Fanciers' Association.

* The cat's uncanny ability to ignore people would help him maintain composure during debates and during appearances on Larry King.

* The new president's motto? "A mouse in every pot and a double-decker cat stroller in every garage."

4 comments:

  1. HAAAHAHAHA!

    I love this one!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hmm, that doesn't sounds half bad..

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am sure a Siamese would win any debate, unless a Ragdoll weighed into it... Their incessant meowing would be able to extend debate until the rest of the feline senate went off for a cat nap .. felinebustering at its best..

    :)

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  4. Kosmos: "felinebustering" = awesome! That's my new favorite word :)

    ReplyDelete

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